Monday , 22 April 2019
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Dis the Gaffer not

G’ Evening folks, it’s me again, your favorite booze guzzling, bike riding, sloth-lazy blogger back to deliver wisdom by the boatload and vent some of that pent up rage once again.

Right…I’m going to pretend that the eerie silence and empty comments sections I perceive are ringing applause instead.

*boilk* (Really got to cut down on the beer)

The gunning faithful are polarized on every issue concerning the great club so all is right with the world cause if all the supporters were to unite, it surely mean the proverbial end of days. Fans will always piss, whine and moan endlessly about their clubs. It’s an immutable rule, that’s just way the sports world is. We will probably never don the glorious red and white or walk onto the pristine green of the Grove to deafening din of sixty thousand of roaring fans, so we tend to try and live the dream vicariously through the players. I guess that’s another reason we fans take so much offence when players decide that their ambitions ‘won’t be realized at Arsenal’.

“That traitorous <insert abuse of choice>…How dare he say that?!!! After all those years….yadda yadda”

The RVP saga has set the fans ablaze and there has been much cursing and haranguing, and I’m quite frankly sick of the whole damn thing. I just wish Wenger would find a non-english buyer and put the whole damn issue to bed. Selling him to any of our direct rival is a completely unacceptable scenario. Already, our inability to hold onto our “star” players is turning us into laughing stocks, and the impact that these drawn out transfer sagas will have on the team psyche and morale can’t be healthy at all.

The social media sites have turned into a smorgasbord of abuse… directed at everything and everyone in the club. I’m quite certain I hear someone slagging Gunnersaurus off just the other day.
Now, I understand that it’s natural to be frustrated and I’d be lying if I said I was perfectly happy with the way things are, but spewing invectives and curses at the Wenger and RVP are as helpful as a parachute in a submarine.

The pre-season has started in earnest and we take on the blue sheiks this evening, I fully expect both clubs to field relatively weaker squads, the managers will be looking this as an opportunity to blood their youngsters and give them just a tiny taste of the intensity that accompanies a clash between two clubs that will be vying for the premier league title. I’m still wondering if Nasri would be playing or he will remain rooted to the bench.

Now, now, let’s shelf those puns about the truculent Frenchman’s career for a while (or we could just bench them……oh).
Down to the more important issue: Arsene Wenger.
Another trophy-less season and the impending loss of our erstwhile captain(s) has obviously left many of you displeased. Accusations of parsimonious acquisitions and expensive contracts to players who do nothing more than warm the bench have been hurled at the boss. Many of these accusations are not without truth but a closer and more unbiased view of the man’s ‘achievements’ prove that we are rather fortunate to have him at the helm. I’d go farther and state that there isn’t a coach in the world who could accomplish what Wenger has done for the club over the last few years. His feats have been catalogued and repeated often enough but I’d take the opportunity to reiterate that there is NO other manager who has moved the club into a larger stadium, kept the account books in the green and competed in the Champions League (on a shoe-string budget) for over decade simultaneously and all that without any ‘financial doping’ from any eccentric billionaire. It just hasn’t been done. And I doubt that this feat will ever be replicated. I have not known an AFC without its most iconic servant: Arsene Wenger. The man may have his flaws but his contributions far outweigh his failures. There is only so much a manager can do with a budget that merely a fraction of the amounts spend by the other denizens of the big four six of English football. Enough youth we cried, and now Wenger has signed experience in the form of Lukas P. and Giroud. The latter may not boast of much experience in the top flight but he definitely knows the value of hard-work and passion after spending a large portion of his career in the lower echelons of French football before breaking into the top division. At 25, the man will naturally be more committed to winning than a 20 year old who is convinced that he is a super star and still has his entire career ahead of him.

The ‘barren trophy cabinet’ is the most common stick that fans pick up to beat the gaffer with but even winning the meanest cup tournaments requires a bit of luck and our recent history proves that lady luck is too busy giggling at Peter Hill-Wood’s imbecilic statements to be blessing us with even a smidgeon of good fortune. The man is embarrassment to the club, I often wish that someone would take him out back and put him out of our misery..…preferably with a shotgun.

Bloody imagery apart, what I mean to say is that Wenger is not someone who can or will be replaced easily (I’d give Jurgen Klopp the nod though) and when he does choose to leave, his successor will have to plug a giant void in the entity that is Arsenal FC. So even if you dislike the man for a reason that is beyond me, show him some respect and get behind the club.

P.S I nicked the picture from the website of the Daily Mail so credit to them.


About Varun Chand

Full time nothing doer and part-time Engineer (supposedly). I really hate the Arsenal and that's why I spend so much of time writing/talking/discussing/debating about them. I enjoy mocking YOU because it's fun.


  1. Nice writing bro! 🙂 Like your style.

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